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Baseball Warns Against "Information Piracy" At World Series

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In a harshly worded statement, Major League Baseball reiterated its policy against the unlawful dissemination of game information without their express written consent. To enforce this edict, all cell phones, cameras, scorecards, abacusses, and all other devices capable of storing information will be banned from within two miles of all World Series games.

All fans attending a World Series game must implicitly agree to the EFUA (End Fan User Agreement) printed on the back of each ticket. This document, likely drafted by the same school of lawyers that developed the SCO Linux License, states, "The ticketholder shall not transmit or aid in transmitting any information about the game... including, but no limited to, any account, description, picture, video, audio, reproduction or other information concerning the game (collectively, 'Everything Within Two Miles Of The Stadium'). The Office of the Commissioner of Baseball is the exclusive owner of all copyrights and other proprietary rights in the game... So there!"

In a colorful pamphlet entitled "One Strike And You're Sued," MLB outlines some of the activities that clearly violate their precious intellectual property:

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