Linux Users Unite ...And Riot: More Funny Fake News

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Linux Advocates Turn Violent, Go On Rampage

Until yesterday, protesters had kept a quiet, good-natured presence outside of the Microsoft's new office in downtown Seattle, handing out free CD's of computer software, and even giving cute little stuffed penguins-their mascot- to the children of passers-by. "They're such NICE young men," said 78 year old Mildred Matthews, walking her dog nearby. "They would pet my dog, and we'd talk about Art Bell, Deep Space Nine and the X Files. I think they just got tired of being repressed and kept down by The Man," said this great-grandmother when interviewed this morning.

But these demonstrators, whose numbers have escalated in recent weeks, did in fact turn violent yesterday, clashing with police in the worst street violence in this city's history.

"I don't know what set them off," said Microsoft Security Chief Lester Richard. "They'd been gathering forces for some time, so I guess I should have expected it.

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