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eBayer seeks to exorcise voodoo cuddly toy

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Those readers who feel that their lives are lacking a little excitement may well be interested in snapping up a possessed Stitch teddy bear which has terrorised a Canadian family to the point that they are now compelled to take the only course of action left to them - offload the voodoo devil cuddly toy on eBay before it decapitates the entire clan in an blood-splattered slashfest of mindless, knife-driven violence.

If you think we're exaggerating here, think again. Since buying the apparently innocent toy in Florida, the unnamed vendors have been subjected to a litany of horror so spine-chilling that those of a nervous disposition are advised to quaff a stiff brandy before continuing. Here are the edited highlights:

Last summer, my fiance & I were visiting her family in Florida, and taking a stop in Disneyworld. As big fans of the Lilo & Stitch movies, we were interested in buying some Stitch toys. We ended up getting quite a few, of all shapes & sizes. We have had no problem with any of them - they're all regular friggin teddy bears. One, however, has been a problem since day one. That was the one we picked up on our way from Orlando to Daytona Beach.

We stopped at a little out of the way place while looking for a restaurant. This place was small, and kind of dingy, but they had food, and a 'gift shop', if you could call it that. I wish I could remember what it was called, but the only thing that seems to ring a bell is 'Leary'. Anyway, they had another Stitch toy there, which looked just as good as any we had picked up in Disneyworld, and was a quarter of the price. The person behind the till seemed a little too pleased to be making the sale, and now I can see why.

We displayed the toys on our TV stand, with some other stuffed animals my fiance has collected over the years. Nothing has ever moved them, except for when cleaning & dusting, and then they are promptly put back in place. After the new Stitch toys were put up, about once a week, we would find one or two of the other stuffed animals on the floor... This became a semi-regular occurance until early November, when we awoke to a loud slam in the middle of the night. I got my fiance to stay upstairs, and crept down to see what was happening... I turned the light on at the front door, and saw that the items on the floor were actually all of the stuffed animals, and other Stitch toys. The only thing left on our TV stand was the Stitch we had picked up from that store. That would have been enough, but the top of the TV was cracked as well - it looked as though something heavy had been dropped onto it.

At this point, I knew that there was something wrong with this 'toy', so right then & there I threw it in the garbage... and went back up to bed to explain to my fiance why that Stitch would not be on the shelf when she got up in the morning. Since I didn't want to scare her, I told her it got ripped open when it fell off the shelf, and I had to throw it away, as it looked too bad to repair. Sleep was hard to come by that night.

The next day I got up early, emptied the garbage, and threw it in the dumpster in the parking lot before leaving for work. Problem solved. Or so I thought...

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