Language Selection

English French German Italian Portuguese Spanish

Secret Future Ubuntu User Interface Plans Revealed!

Filed under
Humor

Recently, a really, really long discussion took place on Launchpad, Ubuntu's bug-tracking system, about the Ubuntu user interface design team's sudden and controversial decision to move window buttons from the right-hand side to the left. It's been widely reported that Mark Shuttleworth, Ubuntu's "SABDFL" (a South African word which roughly translates in English to "BADASS"), announced in response to numerous complaints that "Ubuntu is not a democracy."

Mr. Shuttleworth also said that "moving everything to the left opens up the space on the right nicely,and I would like to experiment in 10.10 with some innovative options there. It's much easier to do that if we make this change now."

But what "innovative options" might he be referring to?

To find out, we contacted Ubuntu's NADOPR (North American Director of Public Relations), Bea Esser, for clarification. Ms. Esser put us in contact with a member of Ubuntu's design team, Drew A. Gooey-Aubergine, who gave us an exclusive look at what innovative new features Ubuntu users might see on the right-hand side of their windows in future releases.

 

For example, there might be an implementation of a boss key by means of the face icon in the upper right-hand corner. In this use-case scenario, explained Mr. Gooey-Aubergine, when you clicked the icon your screen would immediately display the following:

"There's nothing that will convince your boss you're working," explained Mr. Gooey-Aubergine, "like the familiar sight of a real operating system like Windows XP."

 

According to Mr. Gooey-Aubergine, Mark Shuttleworth has been asking all Ubuntu teams to come up with possible ways to increase revenue. "That's a real natural for us, as opposed to, say, those eggheads in the kernel team," said Mr. Gooey-Aubergine. "We've been expecting this request for a long time now."

One possible way would be through a PayPal link.

 

And there's the tried-and-true Google Ads. "These would only be displayed if there was an active Internet connection," explained Mr. Gooey-Aubergine, "making these double as a sort of Network Monitor."

 

Finally, Mr. Gooey-Aubergine seemed to be the most excited about the possibility of adding an Ubuntu Menu. "Think of all the things we could do with that!" he exclaimed. "We could be the first Linux distribution bundled with a one-click "Upgrade to Debian" feature! Although," he admitted, "we haven't passed that one by Mark yet." Nor. as it turned out, had he asked Mr. Shuttleworth about the "uninstall" option.

We'll have more reporting on this exciting story as it develops. In the meantime, what would you want to see in an Ubuntu window? Feel free to add your comments!

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.

Ubuntu has lost touch with reality and is dying

Great satire piece - and as with great satire, there are many grains of truth. And some of your "suggestions" could turn into really useful ideas.

That said, I have been saddened by Ubuntu for the past two releases...and the silliness being displayed by the leadership on this design issue makes me fear for the development of this project. Having used both eeebuntu (EB3) and Ubuntu Eee (easy peasy), I am very excited about eebuntu's move to debian. Ubuntu is getting too large for its own britches...and I truly hope the new version is amazing...but I won't hold my breath.

Haha..I do like the article,

Haha..I do like the article, thanks for that.

However I have to disagree with the poster above. I don't think that Ubuntu has lost touch with reality, I think it's the users and critics that have. The fact is, Ubuntu is NOT democracy, nor' are they bound to the terms/standards handed out by users. Granted, it's nice to listen to the people, and consider their suggestions-- but the fact is, they have to make their own choices. As said by Shuttleworth himself, they are not a democracy..and it's all very true. They've never been a democracy, and they never will be. This goes for all companies..including Novel, KDE, etc. You can't just put out an idea and expect it to always be implemented. It doesn't work that way..unless you own YOUR own company.

I also think, however..that people are seriously over-reacting to the button placing. Who's to say it will be permanent? Maybe they simply want to try it out? Give it a chance maybe? I mean seriously..calm down people Big Grin..and if it doesn't work to your liking, and it sucks..and they fail to listen to everyone in the future..move on.

It's Open Source, If You Recall...

Just change the buttons back yourself. See here: www.howtogeek.com/howto/13535/move-window-buttons-back-to-the-right-in-ubuntu-10.04/

Many a true word spoken in jest...

The notion that good ole 'Bunty may someday become adware - carrying Google adds or links to PayPal - is utterly horrific! Methinks I will be joining lots of folks and hitting the mythical "Upgrade to Debian" button if that ever comes to pass. lol. Big Grin

Alternatively, "sudo apt-get install adblock-for-ubuntu" anyone? Devil

More in Tux Machines

Finally: Historic Eudora email code goes open source

The source code to the Eudora email client is being released by the Computer History Museum, after five years of discussion with the IP owner, Qualcomm. The Mac software was well loved by early internet adopters and power users, with versions appearing for Palm, Newton and Windows. At one time, the brand was so synonymous with email that Lycos used Eudora to brand its own webmail service. As the Mountain View, California museum has noted, "It’s hard to overstate Eudora’s popularity in the mid-1990s." Read more Also: The Computer History Museum Just Made Eudora Open Source

Android Leftovers

Security Leftovers, Mostly 'Spectre' and 'Meltdown' Related

  • More Meltdown/Spectre Variants
  • Spectre V2 & Meltdown Linux Fixes Might Get Disabled For Atom N270 & Other In-Order CPUs
    There's a suggestion/proposal to disable the Spectre Variant Two and Meltdown mitigation by default with the Linux kernel for in-order CPUs. If you have an old netbook still in use or the other once popular devices powered by the Intel Atom N270 or other in-order processors, there may be some reprieve when upgrading kernels in the future to get the Spectre/Meltdown mitigation disabled by default since these CPUs aren't vulnerable to attack but having the mitigation in place can be costly performance-wise.
  • Linux 4.17 Lands Initial Spectre V4 "Speculative Store Bypass" For POWER CPUs
    Following yesterday's public disclosure of Spectre Variant Four, a.k.a. Speculative Store Bypass, the Intel/AMD mitigation work immediately landed while overnight the POWER CPU patch landed.
  • New Variant Of Spectre And Meltdown CPU Flaw Found; Fix Affects Performance
  • Ubuntu 18.04 LTS Gets First Kernel Update with Patch for Spectre Variant 4 Flaw
    Canonical released the first kernel security update for its Ubuntu 18.04 LTS (Bionic Beaver) operating system to fix a security issue that affects this release of Ubuntu and its derivatives. As you can imagine, the kernel security update patches the Ubuntu 18.04 LTS (Bionic Beaver) operating system against the recently disclosed Speculative Store Buffer Bypass (SSBB) side-channel vulnerability, also known as Spectre Variant 4 or CVE-2018-3639, which could let a local attacker expose sensitive information in vulnerable systems.
  • RHEL and CentOS Linux 7 Receive Mitigations for Spectre Variant 4 Vulnerability
    As promised earlier this week, Red Hat released software mitigations for all of its affected products against the recently disclosed Spectre Variant 4 security vulnerability that also affects its derivatives, including CentOS Linux. On May 21, 2018, security researchers from Google Project Zero and Microsoft Security Response Center have publicly disclosed two new variants of the industry-wide issue known as Spectre, variants 3a and 4. The latter, Spectre Variant 4, is identified as CVE-2018-3639 and appears to have an important security impact on any Linux-based operating system, including all of its Red Hat's products and its derivatives, such as CentOS Linux.

LXQt 0.13 Desktop Environment Officially Released, It's Coming to Lubuntu 18.10

For starters, all of LXQt's components are now ready to be built against the recently released Qt 5.11 application framework, and out-of-source-builds are now mandatory. LXQt 0.13.0 also disabled the menu-cached functionality, making it optional from now on in both the panel and runner, thus preventing memory leaks and avoiding any issues that may occur when shutting down or restarting LXQt. Read more