Pointy Haired Boss Issues Press Releases About His Personal Life
Things are pretty slow here at Humorix. Jon Splatz took a lunch break last year and hasn't been seen since. Our attorney, Noah Morals, has remained out of sight after losing his 500th lawsuit. And our investigative reporter, Dances With Herring, is deep undercover at Google World Headquarters. [Oops, maybe we shouldn't have revealed that].
We might be short on staff, but we're not short on incoming spampress releases from worthless Sillycon Valley companies. During the last several months, we've received an amusing series of announcements from a certain corporate executive who likes to see his name in print. We've copied a few of these press releases below and provided a rough translation for each.