Facing growing expenses and a lack of motivation, many of the world's leading evil geniuses and conspirators are no longer plotting world domination, according to a new survey conducted by the US Census Bureau.
The U.S. Supreme Court Sponsored By Coca-Cola ruled today that Gouge's Movie Theater of Sillycon Valley, California, is not responsible for the death of eight-year-old Eric Glueckless even though it was their EMP pulse that literally caused his head to explode.
If you thought the security holes in Internet Explorer were large enough to push a G-class star through, then you haven't seen anything yet.
College student Jacque Johnson was getting ready to show his buddies the new XXX website he had found. But instead of being greeted by the fine specimens of BobsHouseOfT-and-AHotChicksUnlimitedXXX.com, he was horrified to see a "Say No To Sex" website produced by a church group.
According to a scientific report, planet Earth's computers are wide open to a virus attack from Little Green Men.
Some windows junkie has put together a shockwave animation making fun of linux and its users. Don't go unless you have a sense of humor.
A TRAIN DRIVER slowed Germany's rail system to a halt after he mistook a giant toy penguin for a dead man in a tuxedo.
In a bizarre incident last week, U.S. Senator Fattecat (R-Washington State) fell off a 30-foot high cliff and sustained several broken bones. His spokesperson claims that the whole thing was "an accident", but the Humorix Vast Spy Network(tm) has uncovered the real reason for the cliff jump: the MPAA told him to.
In a harshly worded statement, Major League Baseball reiterated its policy against the unlawful dissemination of game information without their express written consent. To enforce this edict, all cell phones, cameras, scorecards, abacusses, and all other devices capable of storing information will be banned from within two miles of all World Series games.
In a dramatic new study to be published in next month's issue of the Journal of Anecdotal Evidence, researchers have concluded that the quantity of available clues is only growing at a slow, linear rate. While computing power might double every 18 months according to Moore's Law, the same growth rate does not apply to cluedom.
One of the IT guys accidentally discovered that the company's phone system, purchased second-hand a few months before, was running on a SCO Unix server. "I had no choice... I had to evacuate the building and shut down all operations!"
Calling it the "greatest copyright violation in the history of civilization," the government of Greece issued a statement today demanding that Italy provide reparations for all of the countless ideas that were stolen by the ancient Romans.
In what could be the greatest programming achievement since the invention of curly braces, James Hacker has successfully shoehorned a bare-bones Linux distribution into an ActiveX applet running under Internet Explorer and Windows XP.
From Mr. N. O. Humor, Attorney at Law, Kil and Profit Law Firm, registered in some random, obscure, easily-bribed country:
Dear Mr. Morals,
I found your "And Now A Word From Our Lawyers" article to be in violation of several of the patents and trademarks of our customers:
Linux isn't for everyone. Seriously. Here are my top five reasons why you shouldn't move to Linux...
In light of recent developments, the Humorix Legal Department decided that we should publish the following disclaimers and notices to avoid any potential lawsuits or fiaSCOs.