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Humor

Microsoft loves Microsoft Linux

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Microsoft loves Microsoft

Summary: A very old cartoon/column (half a century old) rewritten to explain where Microsoft stands when it comes to "loving" Linux

The Microsoft Commandments

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Microsoft B0rg

  1. Thou shalt not host a FOSS project outside GitHub (otherwise it won’t ‘count’)
  2. Thou shalt not edit code without Visual Studio (which now has an “open” — albeit spying and malicious — component for openwashing purposes)
  3. Thou shalt not code without .NET (or Mono)
  4. Thou shalt not use a voting machine without Windows (we have just announced some openwashing component to make up for the NSA back doors that compromise elections worldwide)
  5. Thou shalt not boot GNU/Linux as a standalone operating system (UEFI might not permit this anyway, unless we sign for approval)
  6. Thou shalt not get get a GNU/Linux distribution outside our Store
  7. Thou shalt not buy a computer without Windows preinstalled; those are “naked PCs” and everyone who buys such PCs is a “pirate”
  8. Thou shalt not disparage or even publicly criticise our staff (that would be in violation of GitHub rules, a Code of Conduct, T&C and so on)
  9. Thou shalt not report back doors in our software or leak NSA tools that take advantage of these (there’s a prison sentence for doing so)
  10. Thou shalt not write in mass media things that refute our narrative (proving that we are chronic liars); we would bribe the publication using advertising money and have you sacked
  11. Thou shalt not use open formats such as OpenDocument except inside Microsoft Office, which is incompatible with all other software (by design)
  12. Thou shalt not distribute Linux without paying Microsoft for patents; we’re still suing companies (in 2019) for having the audacity to do so
  13. Thou shalt not host a site or a service outside Azure; we'd sic patent trolls at you
  14. Thou shalt not oppose Microsoft’s lock-in and proprietary software shims inside Linux; we’d send our media partners (Condé Nast) to oust you, at least for a month if not permanently
  15. Thou shalt not report our crimes to the authorities; doing so would make you a “toxic”, “intolerant” person
  16. Thou shalt not use the GPL unless all other options have been exhausted
  17. Thou shalt not adopt a Web browser other than MSIE or our rebranded Chrome, also known as Edge; we’d occasionally tinker with your computer’s settings to remind you to quit using other browsers or refuse the download of such “malware”

Observations of a Egotistical Technical Elitist

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Lets be honest, the title alone sets the tone of this post, so please no comments stating i'm an elitist snob, because this i'm am keenly aware of. However a touch of honesty now and again does tend to go a long way.

So what's the problem? Well there are more than one and they grind me down on a daily basis, so it's time to air them here and these are all tech issues..

So lets start with...

2012 Year of the Linux Desktop

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I declare 2012 the Year of the Linux Desktop! At least on my computer. Smile

Happy Birthday Susan aka srlinuxx

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Happy Birthday Susan aka srlinuxx!!! I can't believe you are 39 yet again! Big Grin Hope you have a great day and a prosperous New Year.

Big oops! Leo Laporte posts love affair online.

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Big oops!!! Leo Laporte delivers technology advice to millions managed to broadcast an explicit Google chat with his lover, exposing the affair he's apparently been carrying on with his CEO.

http://gawker.com/5870610/how-the-voice-of-tech-leaked-his-own-sex-chat

Looks like someone has been very very naughty! LOL

Find His Porn: Evil Website of the Week

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Just found this on Read Write Web...

Here's our nominee for most evil Web service of the week:FindHisPorn.com. For a one-time low price of $49.99 only $19.95! Limited time offer!, you can allow a dubious piece of Java voodoo onto your PC (Windows only) and let it scrape the contents of your hard drive and show you all the porn it finds. It's just perfect for spying on that special someone in your life.

Find His Porn is cynically exploiting the paranoid and freaked-out, violating privacy, jeopardizing security and taking people's money. It has been created under a total veil of secrecy. Oh, it's also "perfect for ✓ Boyfriends, ✓ Husbands and ✓ Kids" with the "goal of empowering women everywhere." With its marketing finely tuned, Find His Porn profits off of people's engrained norms, broken trust and technical ignorance

Read more...

*A Cow based Economics Lesson;

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SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbor.

COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and sells you some milk.

There are more...

Mozilla forms partnership with Tylenol

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Firefox product manager Asa Dotzler said today that Mozilla has formed a partnership with Tylenol. This is in response to the business community after complaints that Mozilla's new "Rapid Release" development cycle will cause headaches for IT managers. So starting today all users who download Firefox 5.0 will also get a coupon for a discount off of Tylenol's "Rapid Release" Gel tablets.

Truths

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My sister forwarded this to me and since things are so dismal in the world these days, I thought a few chuckles might be the order of the day.

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